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Smart Remarks

Q: What were the 2 Mexican Fire-Fighting Brother's names?

A: Hose A and Hose B

 

What do you call a Mexican/Spaniard/ Portuguese/ Venezuelan with a vasectomy?

A dry Martinez.

What kind of cans are there in Mexico?

Mexicans.

Yo mama’s glasses are so thick that when she looks on a map she can see people waving.

 

 Yo mama so dumb, her favorite color is clear!

 

Yo mama is so dumb; she tripped over a cordless phone

 

Yo mama's so dumb; she drowned during the wave at the football stadium.

You know you’re a redneck if you go to a family reunion looking for a girlfriend.

 

Rednecks don't let friends drive home drunk, they get drunk and ride with them.

 

You might be a redneck if your jack-o lantern on your porch has more teeth than you do.

 

You know you're a redneck when your stair master has an ashtray!

 

What do you call an Alabama farmer with a sheep under each arm?
-A pimp.

 

How can you tell if a redneck is married?
-There is tobacco spit stains on BOTH sides of his pickup truck.

 

 

Q: Why did God invent armadillos?

A: So that rednecks can have 'possum on the half-shell.

 

What do u call a truck load of vibrators?

Toys for twats.

 

What do you call a sheep with no legs?
-A cloud.

~Submitted by Ranchita~

To contact Ranchita or submit a joke/smart remark, Send e-mail to divas_newsletter@yahoo.com Attention: Ranchita